Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Grrr... You must be kidding me!

Ever have one of those moments when your like, "what the heck have we done ALL this for?" I'm having these moments. Totally frustrated, bummed out and yet proud and grateful too.

We've been living with Doug's parents to help out with his step-dad who has alzheimer's and although I deeply love them this arrangement is hard for many reasons. So, we've been trying to get a mortgage for our land and build or buy something. Nothing big mind you, a shack would be nice at this point.

Doug and I have worked really hard to get debt free. We took the Dave Ramsey course, our credit score is up 77 points, no cc debt, no car payments! PTL (praise the Lord) We made the decision that it was time to try before all my sanity was gone and I had to be hauled away in a white jacket to a padded room.

Mortgage lady called today. First,it wasn't who we've been talking to. Second, she was rude. At last but not least she said no. Apparently when it's good news the mortgage broker you talk to and deal with will call you, but if not you get the lady that has nothing better to do than be rude to you. She starts by telling me we are 13 points from having our loan. Then that we need to get a credit card to boost our credit score so that we can get the loan. Ummmm, HELLO, we just got out of debt! So I told her no we were not going to do that. She not so politely tells me "well, then, there is nothing we can do for you!"

GRRRR... I mean really, you must be kidding me. Nothing, nadda? Seriously?

It's it legal to live in a tent?

Who Am I?

Who am I? I'm Trish Davis. Daugther of Tom & Karen, older sister to Taren, Wife to Doug, Mom to Kaitlyn, Bryce, Tyler, Alex & Andy.

What makes me so special and worthy to read about. Absolutely nothing. I don't have any special powers except for maybe my crabby mommy powers. I'm not a writer or big thinker, so I'm not sure what compelled me to try this out. I wasn't even sure what to name this blog. I wanted whoami, whoaminow, or jackofalltrades but, those were taken so here I am with crabbymommypowers. Which I always want to miss type as Crappy Mommy Powers.

I'm married to an incredible man, Doug. Who despite all my issues puts up with and loves me. How he does it is beyond me. I'm so blessed to have him in my life.

I've had five of the most beautiful children, all of whom I adore and one whom I miss immensely. Kaitlyn died of SIDS in 1993. Praise the Lord my four, somewhat spoiled, boys are perfect. OK, not perfect but at least health wise they are pretty darn close!

My sister is just my favorite person and I love her dearly. She's amazing, I aspire to be her!

Me well I'm just me. There was a time in my life that I was so bored. I did nothing really. (unless you count a pity party or two.) I have a track record of not being able to finish things or losing interest pretty quickly. I never in a million years thought my life would turn out the way it has. You know, as your daydreaming about what your perfect little life will be like when you grow up. Who knew all the twists and turns my life would take. Now here I am wife, mom, pastor's secretary, co-children's pastor (with my hubby). Life is good and yet somehow like how did I get here? Wow this is crazy, I'm sure I'll wake up soon.

You see I was the wild child. Yep, I stayed grounded, in trouble, my parents were even encouraged to put me in a girl's home. So I guess it's no wonder why I sit back and think who am I now? Look how far I've come. My boys, often frustrated with the fact they can't get away with things, I try to tell them I have done it ALL! There is nothing you can think about doing that I haven't done already. (well maybe a few things, but I'm not telling them that.)

It's really strange how much a person can change over the years. I'm here to tell you now, had it not been for Jesus I would probably be dead. There is a song that says the only thing good about me is Jesus. SO TRUE! I know me and I can assure you that is the truth. I am not, on my own an exceedingly nice person. Hence the crabby mommy powers, I have suffered with depression probably my whole life, at least as long as I can remember. Even now it is a struggle, but somehow I (with a whole lot of help) seem to be making it through.

I realize how random that all was and probably sounded ridculous, but I guess it's a start. So many things I want to get out but for now that's it. What a journey my life has been so far. I'm still trying to figure out exactly who I am, but for now I guess I'm just me will have to do.