Timeless Truths

A timeless truth is a wise saying is followed and applied to life, brings positive results to your efforts - orderliness, success, contentment, happiness, security.... The Proverbs in the Bible are more than just wise sayings; they are divine wisdom itself, for they come from the mind of God, who is the author and creator of life. Read & apply the timeless truths found in Proverbs, and you will not only experience positive results from your efforts, but these results will have eternal significance. God himself will shower you with divine blessings, give you guidance for your next move, offer discernment in difficult situations and help you see the difference between right and wrong, important and trivial, wise and foolish, temporary and eternal.

But it is not enough to just read and know these wise words we must live them out day by day. We must obey.

Proverbs 1:2 " The purpose of the provers is to teach people wisdom and discipline, and to help them understand wise sayings."

Prov. 1:23 "Come here and listen to me! I'll pour out the spirit of wisdom upon you and make you wise."

Prov. 2:1 "My child, listen to me and treasure my instruction."

Understanding

Most of us want spiritual understanding, but we aren't willing to pursue it any further than listening to a few sermons or rushing through ten minutes of Bible reading. Often our failure to understand God's Word is due to our unwillingness to invest time & energy in persistent, serious Bible study. If you really want to understand scripture, consider following a focused & systematic plan of study. Make a commitment to apply to your daily life whatever truth you learn. When God sees that we are serious about pursuing truth & wisdom He opens our minds to understand some of the magnificent mysteries of the Spiritual life.

Proverbs 2:2b-7 ..."concentrate on understanding. Cry out for insight and understanding. Search for them as you would for lost money or hidden treasure. Then you will understand what it is to fear the Lord, and you will gain knowledge of God. For the Lord grants wisdom. He grants a treasure of good sense to the godly, He is their shield, protecting those who walk with integrity."

Mother of Pearl: Day 4

What I Am Not by Tricia Goyer

Becoming a mother is a complicated thing. Not only am I trying to negotiate a relationship with my child, I am trying to negotiate a relationship with myself as I attempt to determine how I mother, how I feel about mothering, how I want to mother and how I wish I was mothered.

— Andrea J. Buchanan, in Mother Shock3

Sometimes the easiest way to discover who we are is to know who we are not.

• We are not our children. We all know mothers who go overboard trying to make themselves look good by making their children look great. I saw one woman on the Oprah television show who had bought her preschool daughter more than twelve pairs of black shoes just so the girl could have different styles to go with her numerous outfits! Just as we -don’t get report cards for mothering, we also -don’t get graded on our child’s looks or accomplishments. While you want your children to do their best and succeed in life, your self-esteem -shouldn’t be wrapped up in your child.

Life as I See It:

My individuality will never end. There will be no one exactly like me, not even my child. She will be like me in some ways, but not at all in others. I -wouldn’t have it any other way.

— Desiree, Texas

• We are not our mothers. I remember the first time I heard my mother’s voice coming out of my mouth. The words “because I told you so .  .  .” escaped before I had a chance to squelch them.

It’s not until we have kids that we truly understand our mothers — all their frets, their nagging, and their worries.

It’s also then that we truly understand their love.

Since you are now a mother, it’s good to think back on how you were raised. If there were traditions or habits that now seem wise and useful, incorporate them into your parenting. You also have permission to sift out things you now know -weren’t good. Just because you’re a product of your mother, that -doesn’t mean you have to turn out just like her. Repeat after me, “I am not my mother.”

• We are not like any other mother out there. Sometimes you may feel like the world’s worst mother. After all, your friend never yells at her son — and sometimes you do. Then again, your friend may feel bad because you have a wonderful bedtime routine that includes stories and songs. In many cases, the moms you feel inferior to only look like they have it together. All moms feel they -don’t “measure up.” Instead of feeling unworthy, we should realize that everyone has strengths and weaknesses. The key is where we place our focus.

The Bible says, “Let’s just go ahead and be what we were made to be, without .  .  . comparing ourselves with each other, or trying to be something we -aren’t” (Romans 12:5 – 6, MESSAGE).

The problem with comparison is, we always measure our weaknesses against the strengths of others.

Instead, we need to thank God for our strengths. We can also ask God to help us overcome our weaknesses — not because we want to compare ourselves, or look good in someone else’s eyes, but because we want to be the best mom out there.

Tricia Goyer is a CBA best-selling author and the winner of two American Christian Fiction Writers’ Book of the Year Awards (Night Song and Dawn of a Thousand Nights). She co-wrote 3:16 Teen Edition with Max Lucado and contributed to the Women of Faith Study Bible. Also a noted marriage and parenting writer, she lives with her husband and children in Arkansas. You can find her online at www.triciagoyer.com or at her weekly radio show, Living Inspired.

Mother of Pearl: Day 3

She’s…My Everything by Suzanne Woods Fisher

“A mother is one who can take the place of all others, but whose place no one else can take.”

--Cardinal Mermillod 

Just a few more months. My mother was hoping Dad would hang on long enough so they could celebrate their sixtieth wedding anniversary in April. But on January 1st, as the sun rose on the new year, my dad’s worn out heart beat its last. Dad had battled Alzheimer’s Disease for ten years. As many of you know, AD is a long, hard journey. Hard on the one afflicted with the disease, hard on the caregivers.

But not without its blessings.

Four years ago, as I began researching stories for Amish Peace: Simple Wisdom for a Complicated World, my path crossed with a handful of Plain families who were coping with Alzheimer’s. It was just about the point when Dad’s illness was shifting from early to mid stages AD and the timing was a divine accident. I learned so much as I observed the calm acceptance of these families. Rather than waste time shaking a fist at God for allowing this disease to take their loved one, they put their energy into trusting God’s sovereignty. They didn’t deny the difficulties and complications and sadness of Alzheimer’s, but they didn’t dwell on them. “God has a plan,” one woman told me. “He always has a plan.”  

Something else I noticed was how privileged my Amish friends felt about caring for their loved one. Caring for the elderly, they believe, is the time to give back to them.

Those encounters shaped my perspective of Dad’s illness. I started to pay attention to how God provided answers to new wrinkles created by Alzheimer’s, just in time. God may be slow, but He is never late.
I started to cherish special moments or good days with Dad—just as he was at each point in his illness. Not mourning the past, not dreading the future.

I really miss my dad. I miss his scratchy whiskers and the way his eyebrows would wiggle at us, even as words failed him. Yet I have such peace in my heart that he was well loved and well cared for, right to the very end. And as hard as Dad’s end of life has been, it isn’t the end. We will meet again. As the saying goes, “Some may see a hopeless end, but as believers we rejoice in an endless hope.”

There’s a beautiful story that illustrates my parents’ 59-year marriage. This event happened about a year or two ago. My sister had accompanied our mother to the doctor appointment for Dad at the Stanford Memory Clinic.

Dad had declined quite a bit that month. He was weak and lethargic, even to the point of whispering, as if it took too much energy to project his voice. During the doctor's appointment, the doctor told my mother and sister that Dad was now in late stages of Alzheimer's. Dad didn’t have much vocabulary left, but when the doctor asked him who mom was, he whispered something back. The doctor looked at Mom and asked, "Did you hear what he just said?"

Mom shook her head.

"When I asked him who you were, he whispered, 'She's...my everything.'"

Suzanne Woods Fisher is a writer of bestselling fiction and non-fiction books about the Old Order Amish. Her interest in the Plain People began with her grandfather, W. D. Benedict, who was raised Plain. Suzanne is the host of Amish Wisdom, a weekly radio program on toginet.com, and writes a bi-monthly column for Christian Post. Suzanne can be found on-line at www.suzannewoodsfisher.com.


Re-printed with permission by Cooking & Such, www.sherrygorebooks.com.



Exciting News – the latest Pearl Girls book, Mother of Pearl: Luminous Legacies and Iridescent Faith will be released this month! Please visit the Pearl Girls Facebook Page (and LIKE us!) for more information! Thanks so much for your support!

Mother Of Pearl: Day 2

Welcome to Pearl Girls™ Mother of Pearl Mother's Day blog series - a week long celebration of moms and mothering. Each day will feature a new post by some of today's best writer's (Tricia Goyer, Sheila Walsh, Suzanne Woods Fisher, Bonnie St. John, and more). I hope you'll join us each day for another unique perspective on Mother's Day.

AND ... do enter the contest for a chance to win a beautiful hand crafted pearl necklace. To enter, just {CLICK THIS LINK} and fill out the short form. Contest runs 5/6-5/13 and the winner will on 5/14. Contest is only open to US and Canadian residents.

If you are unfamiliar with Pearl Girls™, please visit www.pearlgirls.info and see what we're all about. In short, we exist to support the work of charities that help women and children in the US and around the globe. Consider purchasing a copy of Pearl Girls: Encountering Grit, Experiencing Grace or one of the Pearl Girls™ products (all GREAT Mother's Day gifts!) to help support Pearl Girls.

And to all you MOMS out there, Happy Mother's Day!


Joy Comes from Perseverance by Sheila Walsh


One of the most important lessons I have learned in my own life is the joy that comes from perseverance. Eugene Peterson, borrowing a phrase from Friedrich Nietzsche, wrote his book  “A Long Obedience in the Same Direction …Discipleship in an Instant Society.” He points to the Psalms as the way believers have always learned to pray what they live and live what they pray but it is not a short journey. It is an intentional commitment to keep walking even when you are worn out.


*If we want to see lasting results in any area of life it’s important to keep walking in that direction.

*If we want to have a better understanding of the Gospel of John then it takes time and commitment to dig deeper day after day.

*If we want to be thinner this summer than last summer then the work begins now not then.
So too in our relationship with Christ…..

*If we want to know Him at a more profoundly intimate level, that also takes an intentional seeking after Him every day.

As a grown woman I have come to love the beauty of this gift. Passing this “mined treasure” onto my son on the other hand has been an interesting challenge.  We live in such a fast paced, attention-challenged culture where the latest thing can be delivered to your doorstep by tomorrow for a few dollars more. But, as you know, by the time it is delivered it has already been replaced or updated!

How do we speak then into the lives of our children to help them understand and value perseverance?

For me…part of the puzzle meant a large piece of poster board, scissors, some photos and a bottle of Elmer’s glue. My son, Christian and I spread everything out on a sheet in the game room as I explained our project. “We’re going to make a family faith-tree,” I said. “These are photos of family on your dad’s side and on mine. Many of them have gone on to be with Jesus but the seeds they planted into our family continue to grow.” Then we wrote down their names and when they came to faith in Christ (as many as I knew).  It was quite something to see when we were finished.

“Your life matters Christian. Running your race well matters.”

That night we read these words from the writer to the Hebrews,

“We are surrounded by a great cloud of people whose lives tell us what faith means. So let us run the race that is before us and never give up.”

Hebrews 12:1 (NCV)

Sheila Walsh is a Bible teacher, speaker, singer, and best-selling author with more than 4 million books sold. Sheila Walsh is the creator of the award-winning Gigi, God’s Little Princess® and her new series, Gabby, God's Little Angel. Meet Gabby in Gabby's Stick-to-It-Day. As a featured speaker with Women of Faith®, Sheila has reached more than 3.5 million women by artistically combining honesty, vulnerability and humor with God’s Word. She resides in Dallas with her husband Barry and son Christian. Visit www.sheilawalsh.com for more information about Sheila, her other books or Women of Faith.

Exciting News – the latest Pearl Girls book, Mother of Pearl: Luminous Legacies and Iridescent Faith will be released this month! Please visit the Pearl Girls Facebook Page (and LIKE us!) for more information! Thanks so much for your support!

Contemplating....

Contemplating.... I've been doing that a lot lately. Seems the more some things come into focus other things seem to blur. Life decision flash through my mind and either bring more clarity or painful remorse. I suppose this is partly normal or at least I hope it is, otherwise I may be a tad nuttier than I suspect I am. Seems there are a lot of painful remorse decisions plaguing my mind's eye lately. As I sit here writing this I know in my head there is no condemnation in Christ there certainly is in the human heart. There are so many things that I don't want to miss out on. I don't want to miss any more opportunities to spend time with any of my boys. I don't want to miss Bryce's graduation, I don't want to miss Tyler's last 2 years of high school. I don't want to miss my kids playing with their grandparents, or miss my niece's ballets or Max's 2nd birthday. I don't want my kids to miss the chance to know their incredible Aunt. To know their super cool Gramps and to watch movies and have popcorn with their Gran.

How is it that we get so wrapped up in our business that we miss everything. We are glued to our phones, computers, and tv that we miss life. We think we have time. Time to spend with our kids, with our husbands, with our families. Suddenly the kids are grown, we are on separate pages with our husbands and what's left of our families lies in ruins. This is not even the worst part of it. The worst part is our separation from God. If we are too busy for our husbands, kids and families, we are mostly certainly to busy for God. He will of course understand our business, won't he? I mean after all we can't expect to really make quality time everyday for Him, we just have SO much going on.

What would happen if we actually gave God the time He deserves? What would happen if we were to pour over the Scriptures the way we pour over Google or spend as much time in prayer as we do watching tv? Would we suddenly watch less tv? Spend less time online? Would we worry as much as we do now? Would our children notice the difference? Would our children pull our their Bibles instead of their ds's? Would they flip on the Bible cd instead of the tv? Would our marriages start to show some love instead of selfishness? Would there be more listening and less finger pointing? How would it impact our work, our witness? Would we then begin to tell others about the love of Jesus? Would we be less afraid of what others think and more bold in Christ?

If Christ came back tomorrow would you be with Him or would you be left behind? I think we will be surprised at who is gone and who is here when that day comes. I'm a nobody really, just a small town girl who has made an enormous amount of mistakes. In the world's eyes my voice has no real value, I'm not rich or famous, no one reads my blogs or really cares what I have to say. But I will say this I refuse to live like God doesn't matter, that He doesn't matter to me because He does. I refuse to miss out on anymore time with Him. I refuse to miss anymore time with my family.

I am a follower of the ONE TRUE GOD. JESUS CHRIST IS MY LORD AND SAVIOR. I believe there is coming a time soon when we will not be able to write those words in public without fear of imprisonment or even death. When that time comes I pray I'll as bold then as now. I long for Christ to be more in the center of my heart and life and not on the outskirts. Lord help me to give You the time you deserve in my life. Help me to not turn our time together into something cheap and disposable. Help me to put You first, and my husband and family where they deserve also. Help me not to lose sight of what You have put me on this earth to do. Help me to use the talents you have given me to accomplish what You will to be done. I love you Lord with all my heart. Help me to show it more to those around me. Help me to bold about Your love for them. Help me to not wimp out on telling those that need you all about you. Thank you for loving me the unlovable and giving me this life that I so don't deserve.  

Tales from the Crypt

Obviously I took a good long break from blogging, not really intentional, I just sorta lost my voice. I do that from time to time, have a lot of writer's block. Someone mentioned to me recently that I hadn't written and honestly the past month I've just been too sick to do any writing whatsoever. I prayed some days that I would just die! Okay Lord just take me, I really can't stand being sick anymore. I felt like I was on my death bed, in my own personal crypt. But alas I've made it, well almost, to the other side. I'm still a little bit sick, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Anyway, I've been working on a project, a book, that has been swirling around in my head for a few years. I don't really have a great way with words like my sister or a friends daughter I know. The following is an unedited, extremely rough, almost incoherent excerpt from my book; tiled "Surviving my childhood and beyond"

For most of my life I’ve felt like life is just passing me by.  Almost like an out of body experience where I was just watching my life and saying who is that and why are we not going in a better direction.  Weird I know, but true none the less. There are so many things I wanted to do that I STILL want to do. When did I lose that independent, outgoing, and no fear person from my youth. When did I become this person who is essentially afraid to leave my house, even some days out of my own bed.  I was always a buck the system kind of gal, never say die and the person who would stand up to anyone on just about any subject. When did I lose that piece of me? When did I become this person that I do not recognize?  I want to be out embracing life and making memories with my kids. I can say a lot of negative things about my childhood, but my parents did some cool things with us. We experienced parts of America. We stood at the Grand Canyon, went up Pike’s Peak, and camped in the KOA’s. I can remember our dad “waking” us up in the wee hours of the morning, gently guiding us to the car where he had the turtle all packed and ready to go and beds for us in the back. We would sleep and he would drive. My kids can’t say that about us or me.

What they can say is that most days I struggle to keep it all together. It isn’t like this every day, but a lot of days are. Maybe they won’t say that maybe they don’t really know the struggle that Mom is going through every day, I pray they don’t. I try to tell them every day, many times, how much I love them, how awesome they are and how proud I am of them. It’s something I really want them to know and understand that Mom loves them and is proud of them. I am still a little bit shocked when my Mom tells me she is proud of me. I can count on one hand the amount of times I’ve actually heard it come out of her mouth (bearing in mind that my mind and memory is terrible).

The past few years have been really hard on me physically and emotionally. I’m still battling both parts and although I seem to finally be getting control over the physical the emotional is really taking it’s time to bounce back. I lost a part of myself the summer between my eighth and ninth grade year that I can never get back and in reality is seems that a lot of my life is like that. I lost so many parts of myself so early on that when I look at myself, I sometimes see, Humpty Dumpty. Like I’ve tried to glue myself back together with the purple glue, you know the stuff, it’s purple until it dries and then becomes clear. Except mine never dried and it’s still all purple.  Slowly, ever so slowly, I am learning to hand over those pieces that the only One that can turn the purple clear. It is an excruciatingly slow process that I’m beginning to wonder if I’ll ever get it all done.  “All the kings’ horses and all the kings’ men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty back to together again”.

When I look back on my life what do I want to see? What will I leave behind? What will people say about me? Did I do anything great? I probably won’t by the world’s standards and that’s okay with me. Did I shine the light of Jesus in this dark world? I’m not doing a great job of that now. Something that I must change! Did I point my children toward the Savior and a real relationship with Him? I can honestly say that I am trying to with everything that is in me. There are still things I want to do, to see, to be and to accomplish. The question is now how? If you know you want to too and you know you need too but you just can’t quite seem to get there. Where do you go from here?

Just call me Laura Stewart

I'm having one of those moments when my chest is s a little puffed out and my head is the size of watermelon! I'm quite proud of myself. Maybe I should go back just a little bit. I found a link to a site called Pinterest. There I found all kinds of things to distract me from the things I was supposed to be doing. Among them was this Pin for sheet storage that I just thought was genius so Martha Stewart and it even had a link to the Martha Stewart video for fitted sheet folding which I promptly pinned. (pinterset lingo). I pulled out all the sheets and reorganized away. Now of course my sheets in their cases don't look that neat and nice but the concept works and it solved some problems I was having with sheet storage, so I'm happy.

For years I've been wanting to try my hand at making hand soap, laundry soap, candles and pretty much anything I can make on my own. I have this fascination with all things homemade. Well with rocketing prices I finally decided to try it. I had already research hundreds of recipes for laundry detergent and hand soap. So I had it narrowed down and honestly I took advice from several peoples posts, including my friend who posted her recipe on facebook, and kind made our own. Same with the hand soap. Last night armed with my recipes, all my ingredients and my hubby we ventured in to the world of Laura Ingles days of making your own soaps.

My liquid soap was a little runnier than I wanted but works really well. Works for dishes, hand soap and yes you could even bath the kids with it. It's wonderful! I stored in the cutest little Better Homes & Gardens canning jars. So cute Doug is designing little cute labels for them.

The liquid laundry soap turned out fabulous! I was so proud! I used it today and it is wonderful! It was easier than I thought it would be.

Next was the dishwasher powder, which by the way is fabulous! Super easy and to me easily rivals the name brands.

All in all it was I'd say it was a great success! I'm feeling very frugal and Martha Stewarty!
Next on my list is fabric softener, Bug Spray (off) and anything else I can find to do!  So, I'm totally addicted to Pinterest! There is a ton of cool stuff on there and I'm loving every second! 

Here are some links that I pulled from in my search

Laundry Soap1 
Laundry Soap2
Dishwasher Powder1
Dishwasher Powder2
Liquid Hand Soap - in my research I found this was the easiest recipe out there for what I wanted.

My Best Friend

I'm feeling a little nostalgic tonight. I listened to a song called 7X70 by Chris August, excellent song. It reminds me partly of my hubby and his dad, who died about 10 yrs. ago. There was a lot of hurt there and Doug made peace with him, was able to see his father come to Christ, and spoke at his funeral. Although I was not able to be there with him through that time (this was the year before we started dating) I am so proud of him now. What courage, love, a mountain of other things it took to do that.

Honestly my best friend is pretty darn amazing. I could tell parts of his life story here although he might kill me but it's not really my story to tell. Some might see only the pain he has been through, but I see this amazing man that has overcome some huge hurts and is today the most loving, forgiving, patient man I know. I've watched him transform over the past (almost) 9 yrs and although it hasn't all be pretty it has been amazing. I'm so incredibly proud of him.

He accepts people as they are and with him what you see is what you get. He isn't a different person at home than he is in public. I love that about him. We don't always agree, we sometimes drive each other crazy but man oh man do I love this man.

He is a great dad who loves all the boys exactly the same. He usually knows just what to say to each of them just when they need to hear it. It's amazing to watch him interact with them. I love how our kids each look up to and respect him. That's saying a lot when you have teenagers!

I'm so incredibly blessed to have him as my husband. I'm thankful that he loves me for me (even the side of me that isn't so great!) I hope he knows just how much I love, adore, respect and admire him. I look forward to each day with him and watching our love and relationship grow over time.

He is truly amazing this best friend of mine!

I love the way he looks at me!

My beautiful family!

Grrr... You must be kidding me!

Ever have one of those moments when your like, "what the heck have we done ALL this for?" I'm having these moments. Totally frustrated, bummed out and yet proud and grateful too.

We've been living with Doug's parents to help out with his step-dad who has alzheimer's and although I deeply love them this arrangement is hard for many reasons. So, we've been trying to get a mortgage for our land and build or buy something. Nothing big mind you, a shack would be nice at this point.

Doug and I have worked really hard to get debt free. We took the Dave Ramsey course, our credit score is up 77 points, no cc debt, no car payments! PTL (praise the Lord) We made the decision that it was time to try before all my sanity was gone and I had to be hauled away in a white jacket to a padded room.

Mortgage lady called today. First,it wasn't who we've been talking to. Second, she was rude. At last but not least she said no. Apparently when it's good news the mortgage broker you talk to and deal with will call you, but if not you get the lady that has nothing better to do than be rude to you. She starts by telling me we are 13 points from having our loan. Then that we need to get a credit card to boost our credit score so that we can get the loan. Ummmm, HELLO, we just got out of debt! So I told her no we were not going to do that. She not so politely tells me "well, then, there is nothing we can do for you!"

GRRRR... I mean really, you must be kidding me. Nothing, nadda? Seriously?

It's it legal to live in a tent?

Who Am I?

Who am I? I'm Trish Davis. Daugther of Tom & Karen, older sister to Taren, Wife to Doug, Mom to Kaitlyn, Bryce, Tyler, Alex & Andy.

What makes me so special and worthy to read about. Absolutely nothing. I don't have any special powers except for maybe my crabby mommy powers. I'm not a writer or big thinker, so I'm not sure what compelled me to try this out. I wasn't even sure what to name this blog. I wanted whoami, whoaminow, or jackofalltrades but, those were taken so here I am with crabbymommypowers. Which I always want to miss type as Crappy Mommy Powers.

I'm married to an incredible man, Doug. Who despite all my issues puts up with and loves me. How he does it is beyond me. I'm so blessed to have him in my life.

I've had five of the most beautiful children, all of whom I adore and one whom I miss immensely. Kaitlyn died of SIDS in 1993. Praise the Lord my four, somewhat spoiled, boys are perfect. OK, not perfect but at least health wise they are pretty darn close!

My sister is just my favorite person and I love her dearly. She's amazing, I aspire to be her!

Me well I'm just me. There was a time in my life that I was so bored. I did nothing really. (unless you count a pity party or two.) I have a track record of not being able to finish things or losing interest pretty quickly. I never in a million years thought my life would turn out the way it has. You know, as your daydreaming about what your perfect little life will be like when you grow up. Who knew all the twists and turns my life would take. Now here I am wife, mom, pastor's secretary, co-children's pastor (with my hubby). Life is good and yet somehow like how did I get here? Wow this is crazy, I'm sure I'll wake up soon.

You see I was the wild child. Yep, I stayed grounded, in trouble, my parents were even encouraged to put me in a girl's home. So I guess it's no wonder why I sit back and think who am I now? Look how far I've come. My boys, often frustrated with the fact they can't get away with things, I try to tell them I have done it ALL! There is nothing you can think about doing that I haven't done already. (well maybe a few things, but I'm not telling them that.)

It's really strange how much a person can change over the years. I'm here to tell you now, had it not been for Jesus I would probably be dead. There is a song that says the only thing good about me is Jesus. SO TRUE! I know me and I can assure you that is the truth. I am not, on my own an exceedingly nice person. Hence the crabby mommy powers, I have suffered with depression probably my whole life, at least as long as I can remember. Even now it is a struggle, but somehow I (with a whole lot of help) seem to be making it through.

I realize how random that all was and probably sounded ridculous, but I guess it's a start. So many things I want to get out but for now that's it. What a journey my life has been so far. I'm still trying to figure out exactly who I am, but for now I guess I'm just me will have to do.